THE FEAR IS GONE

WARNING- IF YOU DON'T LIKE SEEING ADULT THEMED PICTURES OR A DISCUSSION ABOUT GAY PORN SKIP READING THIS POST!

I decided to post a responses to an e-mail I received this weekend that asked a sensible question that I had wondered about as well. I decided to post the answer on this blog since the others are really not designed for posts like this one.

The sensible e-mail of the week comes from Borderboys-Borderhunks reader Kevin:

Kevin wrote, "Since you have a better understanding about the ins and outs of the adult movie industry there is something that has got me thinking about the way the Adult movie industry works nowdays compared to the mid 80’s when AIDs was the big issue and bareback sex was became a no-no and condoms were a required accessory in both gay and straight movies.

I notice that in a majority of the clips/movies that you post on both the Borderboys & Borderhunks sites that the oral portions are almost always performed without a condom, the actual sex scenes use condoms but the aftermath is generally without a condom – I’m talking about after the climax when, in a lot of cases, the cum covered penis ends up in someone’s mouth.

While I realize that models are required to provide proof of their HIV status etc, why is it that condoms are still used in scenes if it is alright to expose the models to semen orally afterwords? Has there been a shift in attitude in the last 20 years or has something else changed in the way AIDs/HIV is viewed?"

Well first of all Kevin, I really did appreciate this e-mail and the way you framed the question.

First let's talk about bareback scenes...yes I randomly post bareback vids and do promote bareback scenes on select companies for one reason- BAREBACK SEX SELLS.

For some reason people tend to enjoy condomless sex scenes more than protected ones and they seem to love facials. The companies that I actively promote are reputable companies that protect their models.

A great example is Boycrush.

Andy Kay has spoken at length about the measures they take- at the expense of the company to make sure their models are HIV negative and safe. Likewise Helix and even foreign companies like OTB Video make sure the models are safe.

Yes there is a risk- no matter how safe one is...there have been cases where undetected herpes has been later found on one former model at one of the companies I promote but in the two years that I have doing Borderboys I have not heard of one case where a model from one of the sites I promote got HIV after filming.

Personally I am not a big fan of bareback sex at home. When I was young I did it with my lover at the time and got Epididymitis- which basically swells up the testicle to the size of a large orange so aside from the HIV risk I am hesitant to bareback, even with my partner of eight and a half years just because I don't want to experience that again!

There are a lot of people that publicly denounce bareback sex- both publicly on websites and allegedly in their private lives but the fact of the matter is a lot of people these days- especially if they are boyfriends and both test negative do it bareback.

And I have seen this myself- I won't get into what performers or former performers I have seen on a personal level barebacking as a rule...those who really know me can probably guess who I am speaking of..- adult performers publicly denounces barebacking and yet do it themselves in the privacy of their homes and out of the public eye.

As far as the facials - even when it is a condom scene, from what I understand at the studios I have a lot of contact with it is usually up to the models themselves how they want to end a scene.

Again let's use Boycrush as an example.

I know for a fact- based on the conversations that I have had with a lot of their models that both Andy Kay and Bryan Kenny never force models to do things that most would consider unsafe. And I feel like since we are dealing with legal adults it is on the individual model if he wants to take the risk of cum swallowing.

Almost no studio uses condoms for blowjobs because statistics have shown for a long time that unless a person has open wounds in the mouth there is not a gig rate of transmission in precum and vid fellatio..I have to check it out but I do believe that there is a higher risk to straight people and lesbians having active oral sex with a female partner...not sure on that so if I am wrong I stand corrected.

Now why such a lax attitude towards the risk of HIV these days?

In the 1980's I was just graduating high school and was just entering adulthood when AIDS reared it's ugly head.

Prior to that we did everything- as kids we didn't have a lot of access to condoms so I would bareback then and "swallowing" was not a big deal.

But when it hit...and in 1985 I lost a friend who was a grade behind me in school to the AIDS virus we all started taking being safe seriously.

Most of the people I knew, including myself, practically wore a body condom when having sex back then. Before medical science (the the government decided it was ok to stop killing off the queers because it permeated into the heterosexual world) and HIV medication prolonged life people stopped fearing it I think.

For most, unlike the 1980's and in to the 90's it was almost a instant death sentence, I think the fear is gone or at least not in the forefront of the minds of youth especially that were born well after the time where AIDS was killing hundreds worldwide a day in the 80's.

Medication has prolonged live and in fact I know people that are HIV positive that have lived with the disease for over 20 years now.

The fact that it isn't a death sentence anymore and that it can be managed- like diabetes- for most people with medications is the number one reason why I believe people take the risks on film and in private as much as they do today.

I do get some flack for promoting bareback sex sites...but again let's get real here. I am not the person running the studios. My job- at least as I envisioned it when I started Borderboys was to honestly watch and review scenes from a consumer point of view without being a moral majority leader.

In other words I understand that bareback sex sells and many enjoy that so just because in my personal life it is usually a no no I will not censor it on the blog and jump on the bandwagon. And for many in the industry that is what it is- again I have seen public adult entertainment figures proclaim that they are against bareback filming yet do it in the privacy of their own lives.

Rather than condemning studios that film bareback my big issue is the health of the models- especially if they are exclusives- when they are not filming. I know a current model from one of the main sites I promote that proclaims, on his personal Facebook and his performer one what he drinks to get fucked up and what he smokes.

I think it is the responsibility of the models- and somewhat the responsibility of a company that signs them as exclusive representatives of their sites- to at least in the public eye present themselves as living a healthy chemical free lifestyle. If I was an adult performer I would be very wary of doing a scene with someone I know gets fucked up a lot and has sex. Let's face it- none of us, straight, bi or gay, make wise choices when it comes to spur of the moment sex especially if we are under the influence of some chemical.

So all in all Kevin I think what has changed is the fact that one doesn't die soon after getting HIV these days so the fear factor is not as in your face as it was for me in the 80's and into the 1990's.

And for many sites it is a matter of economics. I can tell by the rate of subscriptions on my blogs and the donations- that are few and far between that studios almost have to present the types of material subscribers want.

There are many that just love bareback and cum swallowing scenes and especially if it has an amateur feel to it and if that gets subscribers in the door, companies who are already struggling to stay afloat because of the effect of piracy of their material on the internet almost have to present that money making genre of gay adult entertainment.

I hope it sufficiently answered the question and I invite others who read this to offer their point of view in the comments!

THANK YOU KEVIN FOR TAKING HE TIME TO WRITE IN AND ASK OF OF THE MOST INTELLIGENT QUESTIONS I HAVE RECEIVED THIS YEAR- I REALLY DO HAVE SOME OF THE MOST INTELLIGENT READERS ON THE PLANET!

JAPAN 8.9 EARTHQUAKE- THE DAY AFTER

Yesterday it didn't take long, here in San Diego for the insane Christian Taliban freaks to go out and start proclaiming that the horrific 8.9 earthquake and subsequent tsunami was indeed Armageddon. My partner went to work yesterday and was accosted by a bunch of these freaks.

So wrapped up in their selves and the delusional thinking they couldn't give a damn about the people in Japan and what they must be going through- just the fact that they think they- in their holiness- will soon be raptured naked up to the cloud being. These people are sick bastards.

The fact of the matter is that this is just something earth does- it is a living body and things shift- especially if it is in an area known as the "ring of fire" like Japan is.

Quite simply the 8.9-magnitude earthquake that struck coastal Japan on Friday, devastating large swaths of the coast and spawning a powerful tsunami, was caused by the Pacific tectonic plate thrusting underneath the country, and forcing the seabed and ocean water upward.

Japan sits on or near the boundary of four tectonic plates: the Pacific, North American, Eurasian and Filipino plates.* These massive slabs of earth's crust are endlessly creeping, slipping, locking up and then jolting again. As these plates butt into each other, pressure builds and builds. Then, very unpredictably, that pressure releases. The release of such tension causes earthquakes, and the sudden lifting of the seabed triggers the tsunami.

And that is what happened.

Meanwhile, I just couldn't even think about posting about adult material yesterday. Living in a coastal area, we also were under an Tsunami advisory and I was glued to the fine live coverage of the event in both the BBC and the Aljazerra English network (probably one of the best not state run sources for real news from the world and the Middle East)- that is continuing today btw, and was heartbroken for the people of japan because I could see devastation like that occurring right here at home if the worst happened.

I won't take your time by posting the horrific pictures of the disaster here or recounting what happened...there are plenty of surces for that.

But I am concerned with one little satellite island in Japan known as "Cat Island".

“Cat Island,” officially known as “Tashiro Island” is an island near Ishinomaki City in Miyagi Prefecture… and yes, to answer your one burning question… it’s covered in cats.You can get from Ishinomaki to Tashirojima (Cat Island) vis a ferry.

Apparently, cats on this island are way more populous than actual people on this island.

There are approximately 100 residents on Cat Island, and most of them are over 70.

One person is 37, and everybody else is over 60 years old. Which makes me really concerned for those that lived on that little island...the tsunami surely engulfed it and would have been on of the first areas of land to feel the full force of the tsunami that had at least 30 meter high wave of destruction according to some reports.

To give you a better idea where it is located here are a couple of Google Earth Maps:

Considering what we saw yesterday...as this literal wall of debris and blackened water swallowed up farm land and house well into the mainland I fear for the residents of that island- both feline and human.

But hus far- even though it has become one of the places- especially for cat lovers like me- to see in Japan there has been no news about Cat island or even the bay area around Ishinomaki City.

A long time reader and email friend that actually lives in Ishinomaki City first told me about "Cat Island" and I have not been able to get in touch with him at all since the quake yesterday.

SO IF YOU HAVE ANY NEWS ABOUT THAT AREA, IF YOU ARE IN JAPAN OR NEAR THAT AREA WHERE YOU MAY BE GETTING MORE ACCURATE NEWS REPORTS PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

In the meantime please keep the people...and the kitties...of Japan in your good thoughts and prayers.

And shame on the freaks that are so self-absorbed by their religious insanity that they fail to have compassion for human suffering and are almost joyfully welcoming a disaster of this magnitude because they think God is coming to get them soon and reward them for being..well...the opposite of what the Christ they claim to worship taught them to be.

Here is an older Thai news video about "Cat Island"

MAKE YOUR OWN KIND OF MUSIC

I got a couple of scathing e-mails from Justin Bieber fans after I did the last post here on the little git. To be fair I went to YouTube and listened to some of his music and...well he sings good but I am not into a little white kid acting like a little black kid and quite frankly his style of music is just not my cup of tea.

Yesterday on my Facebook I posted a few songs by "Mama" Cass Elliot.

My partner and i were playing a station on I-tunes and randomly heard a Mamas and Papas song and it got me thinking about Cass and how she defied what the music industry, especially today, will sign as an artist.

Cass always had a weight problem that was glandular and despite the rumors she never choked on a ham sandwich- she died of heart failure way too young and at the peak of her solo career. She was an incredible singer and quite the entertainer.

It got me thinking about pop music today and what sells...or better yet what is sold to us and especially youth. Lady Gaga and acts like Justin Bieber sell. Gaga is a manufactured star now that is like a present day Madonna and Bieber...well let's get real here.

If he was an obese 17-year-old he probably would have never been signed to a record deal. The reason people like that boy so much is because of the cuteness factor (something I really don't see at all btw).

Whether it is a teenage girl or boy or an oldie that lusts after teen pop stars it seems that there was more of a buzz about this kid when the paparazzi caught him shirtless on a beach rather than the quality of his music.

Not to rag on what singing talent Bieber has but seriously if he looked like he does in this photoshop picture and had man boobs in those beach shirtless pics do you think half of more of his avid fan base would still be there?

I don't think so becaiuse today with all the media outlets online, on the TV and even on our phones, with the popularity of music videos they have to have singers that are visually appealing.

Look at the group from the 80's and 90's Wilson Phillips and member Carnie Wilson...partly for health reason but mostly to make sure she was able to advance the career especially on TV she had gastric bypass surgery and just last year was struggling with her weight again in this People magazine piece.

This woman too has an amazingly beautiful voice yet sadly when you put her name into YouTube or Google you find more articles and videos that have to do with her weight loss or gain then the music she made and her singing talent.

Lucky for the people in the 60's and early 70's that they didn't have MTV and that female musicians didn't have to dress up like ten dollar whores on a street corner to sell their music...the world embraced Cass Elliot because not only was she a great entertainer she also was one hell of a great vocalist.

So go ahead and love homophobic Justin Bieber just because you fantasize having tjis twink naked in bed with you. If that is your scene that is on you. I prefer to judge talent based on vocal ability not a cuteness factor.

It just makes me wonder how many chubby boys and girls have tried to get a record deal with an amzing singing voice but was turned down by record company executives because they were too fat or not pretty enough to sell their CD's.

Sad really that there is probably hundreds of talented singers that will never get a break in the United States just because of that while this little wiggery twit makes bank because people think he is a hotty.

To read more about the life and career of Cass Elliot right click here to check out the biography seen in the first pic in this post today!

Here is a song with Carnie Wilson singing lead vocals:



And this is a great song by Cass Elliot when she was shedding the "Mama" part of the name so she would be respected as solo act Cass Elliot.

GO AHEAD CHUBBY SINGERS...LIKE CASS SAID- "MAKE YOUR OWN KIND OF MUSIC!"

FUCK YOU JUSTIN BIEBER

Sorry I haven't posted here in forever but I really didn't have too much to write about...well actually I do but the time isn't right yet.

Today however this trailer park looking singer- Justin Bieber pissed me off in his Rolling Stone interview.

Pink News reported the story like this:

In an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, he appeared to label homosexuality as a choice rather than something that is uncontrollable.

He also spoke out against abortion even when pregnancy is caused by rape, saying “everything happens for a reason.”
The interview for next month’s Rolling Stone magazine has been distributed via blogs.

When asked what his views on homosexuality are, Bieber responded: “It’s everyone’s own decision to do that. It doesn’t affect me and shouldn’t affect anyone else.”

It is not clear whether he intended to label homosexuality as a lifestyle choice.

NOT CLEAR PINK NEWS?

So the same gay boys that buy your shitty music decide one day to "do that" and subject themselves to bullying, ridicule, beatings and other traumas that many gay teens and adults go through, Justin?

Come on his statement was crystal clear- maybe that is because he choses not to do that or the record company told him he must be straight or his music will not sell.

Bieber’s position stands in contrast with that of Lady Gaga who last year said: “there are some people in this world that believe being gay is a choice. It’s not a choice, we’re born this way.” Her single ‘Born This Way’ has been described as the new gay anthem by Sir Elton John.

In his interview with Rolling Stone magazine, Bieber went on to say “I think you should just wait for the person you’re … in love with,” when asked about abstinence.

Despite his strong Christian background he did not argue against pre-martial sex.

“I really don’t believe in abortion,” he told the magazine “I think [an embryo] is a human. It’s like killing a baby.”

He added that while it is “really sad” for a woman to become pregnant after being raped, he claimed that “everything happens for a reason.”

“I don’t know how that would be a reason,” he added. “I guess I haven’t been in that position, so I wouldn’t be able to judge that.”

Ok this kid is an idiot- bright as a small appliance bulb.

But what really infuriates me is Rolling Stone magazine...why the fuck did they ask him questions about ADULT issues when he clearly isn't mature enough to give an informed opinion and is just parroting what he has been fed by parents and preachers?

Isn't Rolling Stone a music magazine and with teen singers shouldn't the interview and conversation be about his music...not whether or not he approves of the millions of fags that buys his music or whether or not a female that was brutally raped should keep the baby conceived by her rapist?

The man in the pic is probably one of those oldies that like this boy because he thinks he is cute not because of any talent...that is just an assumption but probably not too far off the mark.

Shame on Rolling Stone and shame on this ignorant little fuck who, more than likely (just look at Ricky Martin) is deep in the corporate music business closet because gay teens will not sell CD's!

So piss off Justin Bieber...no one chooses to be gay...science already has proved that...but people can choose to stay in the closet for the sake of a lucrative movie or music career...aint that so Justin Booby?

Here's a real good and really straight canadian- and a "Justin" who isn't an idiot like you...Justin LeBeau from Squirtz!

THE SEXUALIZATION OF JUSTIN BIEBER

I am getting some real bizzare questions on my Formspring...so I want to just mention something about it this morning before I get set to do the Borderboys post.

The latest were a string of questions about Justin Bieber. Now quite frankly until tjis morning I never really listened to anything this kid did so I just knew his name and not his music.

One of the questions asked "Do you think Justin Bieber is well hung?"

My response on my Formspring was "I don't listen to Justin Bieber and quite frankly barely know who he is - not my type of music. I really don't care about his cock size but I bet he looks good in drag."

Just look at the cheekbones...I can see him all painted up and doing a show at a local gay club in the mid west lol.

Seriously, until today I never really bothered to listen to his music. It just isn't the type of music I like . I have seen him on interviews and every time my gaydar goes off like a three-alarm fire siren.

The kid sings good but the music industry made sure they write him songs to appeal to teenage girls. Everything is heterosexual in the music biz when it comes to a male teen performer.

As I looked around Google this morning I couldn't get over how many fan sites, like this one on blogspot, spend more time talikning about shirtless- photoshopped or taken by paparazi, then his music.

At the AMERICAN MUSIC AWARDS Justin Bieber taking home his first-ever AMAs winning 4 total, including Artist of the Year!

Alright the guy does have a good voice but you have to ask yourself- if he was a hundred pounds heavier and didn't have the drag queen perfect face and the fit body would this 16-year-old Canadian twink be as much of a sensation as he seems to be?

I don't think so.

No offense against this kid's talent...he clearly is a good singer but herein lies one of the hypocriosies of our world. In the music business they almost encourage teenage girls and others to sexualize mid-teen performers like Justin Bieber to sell him to a fan base.

But if someone posts random pics of guys his age on blogspot, in speedos, suddenly they get a suspeneded account on most blog sites because they are sexualizing underage boys.

But in cases like Justin, the Jonas Brothers and so many others it was the sex and the wondering- like the ano0nymous person that asked the question- what lies below the belt, if he shaves his pubes like his armpits and a myriad of other things that have absolutely nothing to do with his musical talent is what the music promoters really want people in their teen celeberties fan base to pay attention to.

Hell it seems it has gone so far with this guy that people are even making Photoshop Justin Bieber Fleshlight ads...

...right click here to see the article.

This singer is 16-years-old and I guess because the music business wants to sell him as a sex object it is alright. But sexualize any other 16-year-old and you will be label a perv or a pedophile.

I personally don't care if this kid is hung or not...what I care about is the music.

But sadly when you have someone that appears to be as queer as a three dollar bill like Justin is to me (I am not saying that he is for sure- just relying on my gaydar that usually is pretty accurate in real life) they are not allowed to be a gay teen singer and females are thrust upon them because in our world gay teens that sing- in the eyes of the music world- will not sell as much as a hetero one will.

When we get an adult openly gay singer then we get a campy stereotype like Adam Lambert...that guy pissed me off. He could have come off as openly guy but mainstream but he chose to perform and present himself like the nelly, queeny stereotype most straights think we all are.

Maybe one day the music biz will wake up and understand that there is a market for one of these teen singers- who are obviously gay to be themselves and sing songs that gay teens can relate to. Until then teens will be shoved in the closet and presented as heterosexual to the masses of screaming teeny6 girls to sell them.

It makes me wonder- in the back of the minds of guys like Justin Bieber, whether he wins awards because of the music or because girls, boys and dirty old men (and I am sure some women too...yes adult females get into teens too...it just isn't as prominent in the news) want to see "how hung he is" or secretly sexualize him.

As for his music- it's not my style but he is a talented singer.

Concerning my Formspring- please don't ask me to comment on the cock size of under age people- famous or not. I put the thing up so readers could ask sensible questions or Borderboys readers could ask questions about performers or the reviews I write.

Oh and don't write in and say, "Chucky you sexualized Justin in your post". I used the pictures today as an example of what people tend to9 be posting- there is a bigger buzz on the blogs I lokked at this morning about this guy half naked as opposed to the actual music he creates- or has carefully written for him to appease the young female fan base.

For those of you, like I, who have never really heard this guy here are a couple of videos...

HUNG 13-YEAR-OLD

Before I head over to Borderboys and do the daily post I had to come to my personal blog...which I know I have neglected...and share a couple of things with you all.

Yesterday was the 12th anniversary of the brutal murder of Matthew Sheppard and twelve years later the country seems to have ignored the plight of bullied kids- especially gay, lesbian, bi or transgendered youth.

When Matthew was murdered and then again a couple of years ago when Lawrence Kind was shot at school by a boy he asked to be his Valentine the news media jumps on the bandwagon and for a week or two everyone is all about ending the mental abuse, via bullying and homophobic attacks, of teenagers forced to walk into the lions den which normally is their school.

In a recent Huffington Post article, here, the writer of the piece starts out by mentioning 13-year-old, self-identified gay teen named Seth Walsh- who after internalizing daily attacks...mostly mental and emotional, from homophobic peers he hung himself on a tree in the family's back yard. (Right click here to see the LA Times story).

Here is how the Huffington Post piece starts:

"Last month, a gentle 13-year-old boy named Seth Walsh went out to the backyard of his house in the small town of Tehachapi, California, and hung himself.

His mother Wendy knew that he was being bullied and harassed because he was gay, but what could she do?

School officials did nothing to intervene, and claim to this day that there was no problem. There was no local chapter of Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays to support her, and no LGBT organizations had any presence in her small town.

All Wendy could do was tell Seth she loved him-- but that wasn't enough."

Aside from the lack of bullying laws and the fact that parents of children who are taught that it alright to bash a queer are not held accountable there is another big problem that twelve years after Matthew Sheppard and weeks after this gentle soul took his own life that seems to be ignored in my opinion.

Before I elaborate please watch this before we continue...



This story made headlines, as have a slew of other suicides by gay teens in the past few weeks. There are also kids that survive like the young man in the Huffington Post story...you really need to go watch the video report on that as well.

There are calls by gay activists groups, celebrities and others for stricter bullying laws and other measures to attempt to help kids like Seth.

But what is never addressed is homophobia when it comes to who should be there to help young gay teens like this boy.

I know of no where in the United States where there is a gay adult male mentoring program for gay teens and their families. These kids can talk to professionals- many times hetero but excepting themselves. But the gay teen really never has...unless they are on of the few and far between that have an adult gay family member- another adult male mentor...preferably ones like me that suffered years of abuse by homophobic peers in junior and senior high school and survived.

You may ask yourself, why is that?

Well it goes hand in hand with the same homophobia that other teens use to bash gay teens. There is this conception that if a gay male is involved with gay youth there is immediately something sexual involved in the older adult males mind. You don't find this type of stereotypical thinking in other situations.

And because of this thinking many gay males, who were survivors of teenage abuse by homophobic bullies, care about kids like Seth but hide in the shadows because there is no organization or mentor program that I know of for gay teens suffering homophobic abuse in the home or at school.

Yes there is Big Brothers but that does not focus on specifically pairing up young gay teens with adult "big brothers' that can not only be an advisor, mentor and advocate for the kid but also for the family as well.

Remember in the case of Seth, according to the Huffington Post story, the school officials claimed there was no problem and did nothing. She had absolutely no affirmative helping organization to turn to.

Ask yourself- if Seth had been afforded the luxury many straight teens have of mentorship would this kid have lost hope and hung himself on a tree and subsequently ended his life at age 13?

I think he would still be here. But when these kids have no one to talk to that really understands the heart-wrenching pain they are silently suffering from inside it sits like a cancer inside until...like in the sad case of Seth Walsh and the tragic case of Lawrence King it ends in a life lost too young and for no good reason.

I could not counsel a teenage mother properly- I could emphathize with her strugglebut since I biologically could have never been a teenage mother I have no practical frame of reference to draw from to offer support and advice.

Conversely I was an emotionally abused gay teenager- outed at age twelve...constantly intimidated and harassed until I exploded and put a stop to it in 11th grade- so I know every single thing this boy was feeling before he hung himself.

Saddness, dispair, helplessness, bewilderment, low self esteem asnd self worth just to name a few. With kids like Seth it not only is the overt bullying- the name calling and the ntimidation. Body language of peers and family play an imnportant role in creating the dispondancy many of these gay kids have today.

Even as an adult body language is the number one thing I look for in people and what, as in a current life case, brings sadness to my heart. You can tell when someone goes through the motions just for show.

Something in your soul knows it.

A gay teen can tell when he is being placated by people because they have to and not because it is done with love and understanding- they are not as stupid or unaware as we think.

In my life as a teen I knew when people would say they cared and understood because they felt obligated or they were doing it for show. In my adult life I see that a lot as well. One person I know hugs all over my boyfriend- I know he truly loves him and he shows it. I am told I am equally loved and valued yet the person's body language tells a different story.

I watch the way he is with my partner...open and freely expressing love and affection and yet with me is it to the point where I have to beg for the affection. When a hug or a show of the "love" that is ptrofessed actually occurs it is quick and the person pulls away. Any initmate discussions have the person cringing and making faces that he obviously cannot see- but my partner has and he sees the difference as well.

So the point of that story is people that have been emotionally abused in their lives can tell by the body language of others what lies behind the surface and facade- and yes when you dincerely do love the other person it does tear your heart out knowing that you are being placated and played like a fiddle.

What does this have to do with Seth and gay adult mentors?

That is just one thing that a ga adult mentor can do for a gay youth- teach them how to recognize who really loves and supports them and who, for whatever reason does it for show. Because when it gets down to the wire for any of us we want tobe certain that we turn to those who mean what they say through actins and not words.

But until there is a change in thinking- straight societies idea that all gay adult males want to get into the pants of gay youth and gay male adults get a pair of balkls and start stepping up to the plate to help kids like Seth we will continue to see suicides, murders or at best the death of the sould of young people who would otherwise turn out to be great humans beings if people would just learn acceptence andmind thjeir own fucking business in this world.

That's the thoughts I have on this today...I will try to write more this werek and will close with the news report about Seth's memorial service below.




Further reading- A GAY TEEN'S SUICIDE NOTE

FOR THE GOOD OF ALL

We lost an American hero this week...



With the passing of Senator Edward Kennedy this past week America lost one of the true heroes that were in existence. It's funny how millions weeped fort pop star Michael Jackson, who apparently died because of an overdose of a drug used in anasthesia and yet many outside of Massachusetts are hardly shedding a tear over the loss of Teddy.

Diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor last year he continued to do what he could in the Senate...something most people who were given that dire diagnosis would not do. The only mistake I feel he made was endorsing Obama...I am not an Obama fan simply because he is not a progressive Democrat. He is a corporatist and I would have liked to have seen Teddy endorse real progressive candidates like Dennis Kuccinich or Mike Gravel. Had he not been given the fatal diagnosis I would have even supported him for President.

Right wing conservatives, thanks to the propaganda put out by the OxyCodon addicted Rush Limbaugh and his clones, painted Teddy as a far left wingnut.



The truth is that Senator Kennedy, especially after his brother John F. Kennedy was assassinated spent his life fighting for the little guy and equal rights for all...including gays.

When my partner's brother was still in California politics I had the pleasure of meeting Senator Kennedy and having a brief conversation with him. There was nothing phony about the man at all and you could sense that he was a sincere man with a strong drive to do what was for the good of all in America.

There are not many like him in the Congress today. Most of these bastards are just concerned with kissing the right corporate or special interest ass so they can get re-elected...and we keep electing them.

Just look at that health care bill they are trying to ram through...if you really look at it you see that it benefits hospitals, pharmaceutical companies and everyone but the little guy...and even imposes some stipulations that the ACLU will surely find objectionable.

So while Americans make a big deal out if losing an insane pop singer that was apparently addicted to prescription drugs (according to the toxicology report) we all should take pause and consider just what we lost when Ted Kennedy passed away.

Conservative Republicans hated him as a liberal- because he did the opposite of what they enjoy doing...while they look to oppress based on hare and irrational fear, Teddy strived to make sure all Americans were treated fairly and equally...a goal that still hasn't been achieved if you consider the Prop 8 vote here in California last November.

So Ted Kennedy was one of my REAL American heroes...

May you soul rest in peace Teddy...and say hi to Bobby and John for me if you will.

This is a great song from the 60's by Dion called Abraham, Martin and John